The cow has refused! Well, that phrase is no longer true. At least not in Meru apparently. There is this guy in Meru who decided to take the cow by its horns. For those not in the know, the story aired on NTV Monday night seven. A woman in Meru heard some commotion at night (am assuming it was moans from the cow) and decided to get out and investigate. A certain guy was busy humping her cow. I think she came out early enough to stop the guy from coming on her cow.
That is not what has caught my eye. I have heard a fair share of horrifying sexual escapades with animals (I had to check the spelling of heard in that sentence coz if I had used had, well …. Ok. I’ll stop now!) The funniest of course was a group of guys who raped a donkey. They figured it would kick their behinds so they dug a trench and buried its legs knee deep and then took rounds at the poor animal. That is what I call hitting an ass from behind.
What caught my eye in the meru incident was the fact that the baga undressed. That guy was actually deriving loads of pleasure from the whole thing. Infact, some of his clothes were actually left at the scene of the crime. It got me thinking, that this idiot actually picks out a cow, approaches it, starts taking dirty to it while undressing. Something like, "Come here you sweet big thing! And look at those tits! WOW! Girl, you are mootifully and udderfully made. Am gonna make you moo!"
He then proceeded to mount the ‘poor’ animal. Poor is in quotes here because maybe the cow liked it. How would I know. It obviously did NOT kick the guy away as he was found nearing the final whistle! What I’d want to know is, what was the cow was thinking when the guy was attempting the while thing? It was obviously talking to one of the of other cows, going something like, "Moo, moo, moreen, you gotta see this. This guy is undressing. Oooh, he looks loaded! Oh shit, he if looking at me funny…. Crap! He is now going behind me. I think he wants to milk me…. He must be… oh wait. Fuck! He is … oh shit! He is mooooooving it inside me! Oh … Wait, Its actually kind of good. Gimme mooo boy. Mooo boy. Mooo boy! Mooooo! MOOOOO!
At which point the owner came rushing in.
The baga obviously decided to run but not before the owner actually recognised him. He is still on the run and hasn’t been found yet by police. He will be charged with misunderstanding the whole thing about animal husbandry.
Wherever he is hiding, am sure his fellow animal lovers have noticed his long face. But if anyone taunts him with that famous, "The cow has refused" line, someone will get kicked. After all *Kiraitu laugh* how do you say that when the cow is already too willing?